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Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. Chuck Norris can have his cake and eat it, too. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs Chuck Norris can slice meat so thin is only has one side, When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. Chuck Norris looks gift horses in the mouth. Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is, The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever. The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live Chuck Norris received an electric shock, the result was Tron Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11… a suicide, Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse you in the face.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist. If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, “Two seconds ’til.” After you ask, “Two seconds ’til what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face, Chuck Norris can speak a language inside of another language, A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.